For some young men, the prospect of becoming a father can be exciting, but more often than not, it can also be scary and leave you feeling anxious. If you’re in this situation, you probably have a million things running through your mind. One of those things may be wondering how to tell your family that your partner is pregnant. It’s a sensitive topic, and it can be a hard discussion to have or even to start at all. Here at RealOptions Obria Medical Clinics, we understand how uncomfortable talking about this issue can be and are here to provide you with some tips on starting and navigating the conversation that will help lead you toward a positive and productive outcome.
How to prepare for the conversation:
Although it may be scary, telling your family that your partner is pregnant is a necessary step in the journey ahead. Starting this conversation can feel overwhelming, but it doesn’t have to be.
We’ve compiled a list of things that will help you be prepared and make the most of this conversation:
- Consider the potential reactions of those involved: While it’s not your responsibility to anticipate how everyone will react, it is important to think through who may be most impacted by this news and any potential reactions they may have. This can help you prepare for questions or conversations that might arise during your family meeting.
- Make sure you have the facts: Before you meet with your family, make sure you have all the information they will need. This includes details such as how far along the pregnancy is, potential medical risks or concerns, and any plans you and the mother may have already made for the future.
- Practice what you want to say: Having a plan of what you want to say will help make the conversation flow more smoothly. This also gives you time to think about how you’ll respond if someone has a negative reaction or wants more information than what you are prepared to offer.
- Choose a place and time: Selecting a neutral location with few distractions can help ensure that everyone involved is comfortable and has an opportunity to voice their thoughts without interruption. Additionally, you should pick a time when everyone can be present without other commitments.
- Decide if you want your partner there with you: Depending on the relationship between your family and the mother of your child, you may or may not want her present for the conversation. If you decide that it’s a good idea for her to be there with you, make sure to involve her in preparing for the discussion.
- Decide if you’d like help: If you anticipate the conversation becoming too overwhelming or heated, consider bringing in a trusted mediator or make an appointment with one of RealOptions’ male optimal health coaches who can help the conversation stay productive and on track.
How to have the conversation:
Preparing is only the beginning. When the time comes to begin the discussion, there are some things that you should keep in mind. Each situation will be unique, but here are some general things to keep in mind as you start the conversation:
- Speak honestly and openly: Let your family know that this is a difficult conversation for you but that it’s important for them to hear what you have to say so that they can understand both the situation and your feelings towards it. Don’t hold back your anxiousness or fear, and don’t downplay how things are affecting you. If you’re afraid, let them know you’re scared. If you’re feeling any excitement at the prospect of being a dad, let them in on it.
- Respect everyone’s feelings: Whether your family is supportive or not, it’s important to acknowledge and respect their different reactions and views. You don’t have to agree with everyone, but remember that this might be shocking, frightening, or even hurtful for some of them at first, and they may need time to adjust.
- Allow for questions: Let your family know that you are open to any questions they may have about the pregnancy, your relationship with the mother, and any plans you may have. Remember that it’s okay to not have all the answers. If you aren’t sure how to answer a particular question, be honest and tell them that you’ll need to think about it or even that you’d like their help in finding the answer or solution.
- Don’t be afraid to ask for help: If needed, let your family know that you would appreciate their help and support. Whether it’s financial or emotional, remember that they may be able to offer resources that could make the situation more manageable.
- Listen to their advice: You don’t have to agree with everything your family says or suggests, but it is essential to listen and consider their thoughts. They may be able to provide a unique perspective from their own experiences that can help you make decisions about this unexpected pregnancy.
- Keep a cool head: Even if the conversation gets heated, try to stay calm. Try to avoid yelling or being overly defensive. Remember that your family may react strongly out of fear and love and may just need time to get to a place where they can really hear you. If it seems like things are escalating out of control, suggest that you take a break and continue the discussion at another time when everyone has some time to process their feelings.
Things may feel overwhelming, but it’s important to remember that you are not alone in this. Many young men throughout time have had to tell their families that their partner is pregnant. By following this advice and remaining open, honest, and respectful throughout the conversation, you can help make everyone involved as comfortable as possible and allow them to express their feelings and support you during the journey ahead.
If you’re still feeling anxious about the conversation ahead of you or about your situation in general, RealOptions Obria Medical Clinics is here for you and your partner. From pregnancy options consultations, pregnancy ultrasounds, optimal health coaching, and prenatal care our services are here to help you both before, during, and after the pregnancy. Don’t hesitate to contact us for more information. Our staff is ready to help!
Schedule an appointment at one of our locations today or call:
400 30th St #401
Oakland, CA 94609
801 Brewster Ave Unit 21
Redwood City, CA 94063
1671 The Alameda #101
San Jose, CA
12 N White Rd
San Jose, CA
33523 Western Ave.
Union City, CA 94857